The Anubis/Dalai Lama Connection Analysed

Ancient Egypt.

Tibet.

One is a world of sand, camels, seasonal flooding and pyramid-souvenir-stands; the other, a mountainous land of snow, goats, monks and Tibetans. What kind of connection could these utterly different places share? According to recent research by the InterwebMegalink, there is much more in common with the two places than anyone had previously believed... maybe too much in common.

Totally Out of Dilithium Crystals

First of all, let’s examine the hystory of Egypt. Where did this mysterious hyper-race come from? The obvious answer is Mars, but is this correct?

Many researchers have suggested that, when all life on Mars had been wiped out, and the Planet Earth nigh-on obliterated by the then-Rogue Planet Venus, the Martians who were already here found themselves without functioning spacecraft, with no home-planet to return to, and totally out of dilithium crystals.¹

Stranded on Earth, this albino super-race used what little technology they had left to create a city like what they had left behind on Mars... a city that became Ancient Egypt. As ex-messiah David Icke points out, the Martian race was “certainly the ‘brains’ behind the Egyptian civilisation, at least from the period around 3,000 BC, and the Giza Plateau, where the Great Pyramid was built, was formerly known as El-Kahira, a name which derived from the Arabic noun El-Kahir, their name for... Mars.”²

(For those of you who doubt the presence of alien creatures in Ancient Egypt, remember that in ‘Stargate’, Ancient Egypt was used as a base for the travel of not only interstellar, but interdimensional beings. Compared to that, beings from only a couple of planets away seem not only plausible, but almost undeniable.)

Retro-Martian in style and character, Ancient Egyptians painted their Sphinx red, and used to reverently call Mars “Hor Dshr, or ‘Horus the Red’”³, perhaps in honour of somebody called Horus. Not only did this ultra-civilisation possess a sound knowledge of astrology, astronomy, Egyptology and how to make papyrus, but were experts in Kung Fu, Tae Kwondo, and other Martian Arts.

But, most interestingly of all, the Ancient Egyptians had a codified Book of the Dead... and who else has a Book of the Dead?

That’s right... the Tibetans.

Green Tablets and Ham

But, before we move onto the mysteries of the Dead, let’s take a quick peek at Alchemy.

“There is a legend which claims that Alchemy was originally the Sacred Art of the Sons of God mentioned in Genesis before the Great Flood. These were the "Fallen Angels" or "Fallen Stars" of God who mated with the women of earth and taught them their Sacred Craft.”⁴ “How does this tie in with Egypt? Or is it meant to tie in to Tibet, or something?” we hear you ask, impatient to hear the “truth”.

Patience, seeker of wisdom, patience.

You see, Alchemy originated in Ancient Egypt as well, and the main book concerning alchemical operations, the fabled Tabula Smaragdina, or Emerald Table of Hermes, was discovered “by soldiers of Alexander the Great in the hands of Hermes' mummy in the Great Pyramid of Gizah, which was, according to legend, the Tomb of Hermes himself.”⁵

But who was Hermes? A Tibetan, perhaps? Unlikely. A Martian? One of the Jackson 5? These are, again, unlikely. Hermes, the evidence suggests, was a Reptile from Beyond the Stars.

As researchers of the Babylonian Brotherhood of the Serpent-Worshipping Illuminati would already be aware, the main “beings” they gain much of their power from are Nimrod and Semiramis, ancient Reptilian beings from the Elder Times. According to legend, Nimrod and Semiramis created “Babylon” after Venus had nearly destroyed the Earth; Semiramis was “the creator of the reptile-human (sic) crossbreeds”⁶, and Nimrod was a Titan, one of the resulting cross-bred Giants. Nimrod’s intergalactic father was none other than “Cush, also known as Bel or Belus, who was the grandson of Noah and son of Ham. Cush became known as the deity, Hermes, which means Son of Ham. Ham or Khem means the ‘burnt one’ and may have been connected to Sun worship”⁷...

So, Hermes, or Khemes, Son of Khem, creator of both Al-Khemi (alchemy) and Khemistry (chemistry), is in fact the father of Nimrod the Titan fish-god, who in turn is one of the pillars of the Babylonian Illuminati. But what has this got to do with Mars? Or Tibet?

Well, it may mean, if Khemes was from the Stars, and taught the Ancient Egyptians Al-Khemi before the Great Cataclysm, that the Egyptians were already well ahead of everyone else long before the Martians even began influencing the course of their hystory! No wonder Egypt is such a hot-spot for the Moccult; the power of the Reptiles being developed so strongly, being destroyed by Rogue Venus, and then being built up again by the hyper-advanced Aryan Martians, being constructed twice on such precise and powerful principles of astrological architecture, being infused and imbued with the surRealities of (at least) two Ancient and Mysterious Cultures...

And remember, they’ve got that Book of the Dead.

And so does Tibet.

An Update or a Coded Mystery?

So it is no surprise to hear recent reports of Ancient Egyptian Gods coming back to Earth and visiting the Tibetan Dalai Lama. One of the more interesting recent sightings of note is that of Anubis, the Egyptian Lord of the Dead, and its meeting with the Dalai Lama in Peru.

According to sources, during a possibly-Martian-themed festival in Peru, a traveller met a monkish couple with what looked like an enormous brown dog - “it had no hair, was dark brown and looked absolutely unworldly”, and “its front legs were much more articulate than even humyn hands... Each hand had 3 finger-structures that looked about 10 inches long”⁸. This creature, the couple explained to the bewildered traveller, was “an alien visitor whom was visiting and congregating with the Dalai Lama.”⁹ Our sources quote the traveller as saying “the creature looked exactly like the Egyptian representation of Anubis”¹⁰.

Remember that little Book of the Dead thing? Well, here is the Egyptian Lord of the Dead (who, no doubt, has some familiarity with the Egyptian Book of the Dead) meeting with the Spiritual Leader of the only other people to also just happen to have a Book of the Dead. What kind of meeting was this to be? A meeting about the Dead, perhaps? A heated discussion over the rights to Mars? A secret conference on the future of Planet Earth? An update from the Reptilians? Or a coded mystery from the Ancient Ones themselves?

We may never know, nor may we ever need to. Two things are for certain; 1) that this Anubis was extraterrestrial, either from Mars or another constellation altogether (metatheoretical mytholographers have suggested Sirius – the Dog Star), and 2) that it smokes dope.

The Master of Tibetan Biokhemistry

According to our aforementioned sources, when approached with a Smouldering Doobie, the couple sitting with Anubis “almost fell over laughing and explained that they did not smoke the stuff, but their stellar companion enjoyed the smoke. They asked if my girlfriend and I would smoke and blow it at the creature... so we did.”¹¹ This might be immediately hard to believe, until one remembers that hystorical re-analysts suggest that an “extreme Egyptian sect called the Therapeutae... had a detailed understanding of drugs, including the hallucinogenic variety, which were used in the mystery school initiations and for entering other states of consciousness.”¹² So too the Tibetans have detailed and systematic medicine systems of Al-Khemi and Khemistry; it is no wonder, then, that Smokin’ Space Anubis chose to meet with the Dalai Lama, Master of Tibetan Biokhemistry...

David Icke suggests that the Dalai Lama is a mind-controlled zombie tool of the Anunnaki, used to co-opt the potential power of possible astral activists¹³. Perhaps this meeting was to change some small part of the “programming”, to allow Anubis and his Martian-Sirian cohorts to come sweeping back in through the Stargate that had been so firmly closed in the Elder Times, and force bloody mutiny against the Reptiles... or perhaps the meeting was just another “Ancient God meets Dalai Lama” publicity-stunt thing orchestrated entirely by the Annunaki to scare the remaining Martians back into hiding...

Whatever happened, one thing is clear: it must be pretty hard to get dope wherever Anubis lives nowadays.

(Or maybe it’s just really leafy.)

The Tibetan/Egyptian Connection Explained

So, is the Dalai Lama from Mars? If so, where does he get his dope from? If the Al-Khemical Arts were taught to humyns in the Elder Times by “Fallen Angels”, this would seem to imply the Enochian-Greys are behind it; does this mean the Enochians are from Mars as well? If Khemes is the Son of “The Burnt One”, does that mean Khemes is the Son of “Lucifer”? If so, is that good or bad? And if the Pyramid of Giza really is the Tomb of Khemes, was it built by mourning Anunnaki, gloating Martians, calculating Enochians, or some cross-bred hybrid of all three?

Whatever the “truth” turns out to be, we can only hope it is half as satisfying as the Miskatonic Chase...

InterwebMegalink Report, 3rd Jan 2005
Department of Interhystoric Improbability Studies